Saturday, September 17, 2011

Sleep MY Pretty!

Awww.. Nothing like sleep! The past few days I have been so wiped out and this prednisone is really adding a new dimension to my many symptoms. It is usually not in the cards for me to lay down and take a nap in the day time...just doesn't happen around here. Yesterday however, I just couldn't function past two in the afternoon... the eyelids were heavy and the muscles were aching and the head was pounding. The sweet little dog was outdoors in her yard and the kitties were curled up for their afternoon nap in the sun as well. The house was quiet ....opportunity at last! OH those sweet little Tizanidine pills are good when the muscles are stiff head went down on the pillow and before I knew it...I had slept several hours. It felt so good and then a few short hours later, I returned to bed once again and I actually slept the whole night through! This morning I was thinking about Dorothy going through the poppy field and getting so sleepy and the witch saying to her through the crystal ball..."Sleep...My Pretty...Sleep".  Yes.. I know you think I am a nut ... that's OK.  I laugh at myself too. But I am so glad for sleep last night. Now maybe today I can actually function. This will be one of those days I will try to make it to town.. This will be one of those days people will see me and say..."You don't look sick to me!" Yeah... cuz they didn't see me the last two... Oh well... I don't really want to scare anyone by having them see me that way when I do feel that way... to my bedroom I flee! 

Thursday, September 15, 2011

So Not Ready...

UGh! It's chilly this morning and I am so not ready for this... It is when the weather turns cooler that my bones and muscles really go into the aching mode and this is when I really need that Tizanidine to relax the stiffness. I looked out and actually saw frost upon the top of my Vibe this morning! NO No NO.... it is still only September.... am I right? I am not sure of the exact temp outside but it must be cold because even as I am thinking on this my furnace just kicked on... OH GREAT~ It will be another long cold winter here in the Northwoods of Wisconsin.... so not ready.. I think I need someone to send me an electric blanket:)

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Okay...Now Where's MY Caregiver?

What goes around comes around...s'posed to anyways... well, sometimes. Many of you know that I have been full time caregiver to my husband for awhile now as he has had a brain injury back in 2005, and is still on quite a few meds and survivor of colon cancer in 2009, and many many episodes in and out of the hospital with Pneumonia and various illnesses over the past several years. There are of course all of the emotional ramifications of a brain injured person to deal with and if you really don't have a clue.... look it up on the internet for Gosh sake and get yourself informed, because pretty much my husband has displayed all, and more, of the behaviours that come with the territiory!  I have pretty much put up with it all. However, this past year I have become very sick with Sarcoidosis in not only my lungs but my lymph nodes, and also have chronic fatigue syndrome and fibromyalgia. In June, I had major thoracic lung surgery and am still dealing with the recovery from that as I had a wedge of my lung removed. Trying to deal with all of this along with all of his mood swings and argumentative stubbornness is not helping me to get any better. Therefore I am making a decision to separate myself from him and I guess his family is going to have to just pitch in and do the job. After all, they all moved up here next to us to be involved in their dear ol' dad's life so I guess this is the why. I am just not well enough to deal with this and I am courageous enough to say so. Lately I have had to put up with a lot of his rantings and ravings and bullyings and it has become an everyday occurrence and my health cannot handle it.  I got brave enough to call 911 about a month ago now, and of course I am in the wrong for doing so. He of course is trying to save his own skin once more by shifting the blame to me, but after all that I have put up with from him I cannot imagine this injustice! So, here I am this morning ... asking you my friends for prayer...

Monday, September 12, 2011

Another Week!

A celebration of some kind should be in order .. I think. I did survive my first week of Prednisone after all! Today begins week number two and so far I have not gained any weight thankfully! I remember the last time I was on this nasty drug I gained over 60 pounds, so I am watching very carefully the carbs and sugars I take in this time. Keeping an eye on the blood sugar and the blood pressure, and all of the rest of those nice little  extra things you have to pay attention to while on this drug.... like, don't be around anyone who is sick! This is going to be a challenge I am sure, since flu season is just about upon us... I am going to try to do my part ... it is always nice if others respect your wishes and stay away when they are sick but it doesn't always happen, as you know. So begins week number two... symptoms are pretty much the same as week number one.. but that is to be expected. My lymph nodes have been enlarged for a long while, my lungs have been congested pretty much since last April, so I am sure this is going to take more than just a few days or weeks to help. As I look out my window on this September morning I see the sun reflecting off of some colored leaves! I will enjoy the beauty of this fall.. This disease has made me wake up and notice things around me a lot more. Perhaps a rude awakening to the fact of the shortness of life. What I need to do is enjoy this very day! I hope you will too and don't let anyone or anything ruin it for you.